![]() ![]() ![]() You are at your best when you’re the manifestation of Cyndi Lauper’s astute anthem “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.” Those are just a few examples of being the real you-the Goddess of Fun and Light (GOFL). What about when you put cereal boxes and fake blood on your shirt for Halloween and called yourself a cereal killer? Or the other day when you were doing your Zumba moves in the kitchen? Remember that time you went camping and you and your friend couldn’t stop laughing for an hour? Letting him talk without correcting, suggesting, teaching, advising or freaking out is a very good start to restoring your magnetism. Start by letting him talk and just listening by saying “Uh-huh” or “Mmmm.” You could decide to be as admiring now as you were back then. It’s what you had early in your relationship, when he was affectionate and you felt desired and you admired him so much for who he was.įamiliarity really does breed contempt sometimes, but it doesn’t have to. It’s knowing you won’t be ridiculed, humiliated, outcast, or criticized even when you sing a Katy Perry song that’s way out of your range. And you say, “Oh well, it’s only money,” instead of telling him he should have checked with you first. It’s when your husband tells you that he just lost a grip of money because the stocks he bought went down. It’s when you admit that you just threw a handful of M&Ms into the living room for your kids to find so you could talk on the phone without interruption for a few minutes, and your friend doesn’t judge you but says, “Wow, great idea!” When you start acting like he is smart, capable and strong (even if you don’t think so), that will go a long way toward bringing back the makeout sessions, snuggling and sex you’re craving. You know how you want him to see you as irresistible, beautiful and lovable? He wants you to see him as smart, capable and strong in the same way. Okay, so those aren’t me, but they are reasonable facsimiles of how I appear when I’m disrespectful versus respectful. But when I look at these pictures now, it seems pretty obvious: I had no idea that was why my husband didn’t show affection for me. I thought of it as “being helpful,” or doing what the experts suggested by “expressing a concern.”Īll of it seemed justified to me–and all of it ruined my chances that he was ever going to come in for a passionate kiss. Not to mention constructive criticism, interrogation, accusation, and downright rude comments. Hopefully you’re not as bad as I was ’cause there was a lot of eye-rolling, sighing, complaining about what he did and questioning his judgment going on around here. I thought I WAS being respectful even though I was disrespectful at least 27 times a day. Here’s the thing: if you’re anything like I was, you have no idea what that looks like. I’ll spell it out (while you imagine Aretha singing it): R-E-S-P-E-C-T. When someone finally did tell me, I had no idea what they were talking about. Maybe no one has ever mentioned it to you either. What’s that? You didn’t know there was an aphrodisiac for men? And that it’s super effective, works fast, and is free? Employ the World’s Best Aphrodisiac for Men Instead, consider that he may not be feeling loved either, even if you are being affectionate with him.įortunately, rather than telling him what he should do, you can naturally restore the petting and flirting by being your best self again. So step one for me was to stop listening to that terrible advice (which, to this day, makes me want to punch someone in the nose). Not only did I feel needy and undignified doing it, it only pushed him further away. Since I had to order him to be affectionate, it was evident that he didn’t want to.īegging for kisses and hugs feels lousy–even if he complies. I wanted to feel desired, just like the old days when he was always smooching me or patting my butt. Because the truth is, getting him to hug and kiss me wasn’t what I wanted I wanted him to WANT to hug and kiss me. If anything, it made my pain and dejection more acute. ![]()
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
Details
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. ArchivesCategories |